Unwind

There is more to life than chasing success

Updated : January 17, 2020 04:00 PM IST

The bliss of pursuing a passion with no thought of en-cashing it is the most liberating emotion.

Success perhaps is less to do with rising to the top of your profession; it is all to do with being in a field of own choosing.

There are many mantras for success out there; in bestseller books and through personalised prayer. We can be violently successful in anything and everything if only we prayed right or learnt to think in a particular way – this is what we are told. And it is seductive to believe that all our failures can be converted thus to the big bang of benefits. We are searching, heart in mouth, for that elusive recipe that will put us on top of the pyramid.

But what is this success that we chase so ardently, for which we betray those closest to us and barter our physical and mental health away for? And does it taste as sweet on the tongue as we always thought it would or does everything feel like ash in the mouth once achieved, once realised?

Dreams are a byproduct of life; as long as we live, we want. We look into shop windows and rattle the loose change in our pockets, ready to dart in and stare up close at this or that. All in thrall of something we cannot afford.

The dream then moves into the fast lane, in sight of zooming vehicles from every which way. One foot on the accelerator, teeth clenched, we drive on and on, past scenic routes, past goodnight-time with children, past even simple pleasures. And suddenly we are there, where we always wanted to be. Then what?

Does the soul realise en route the utter futility of reaching the said destination? Because most of us find our feet slowing down somewhere along the way. Our desires are tempered with a practical sense, the material world stands diffused before our eyes. In its place springs up a nebulous and incoherent understanding of the universe’s mechanics, its gentle ways and subtle nudge.

We still bide our time, with detours into occult, into astrology, into art and relationships. The meaning of life that we sought now begins to seek us. And we sit back and muse anew on this thing called success. Is it money or fame or a happy marriage or educated offspring or good health or a long life – or none of the above?

With the word ‘success’ itself inserting itself into a new dictionary, we access definitions internally arrived at.

Success is not being in the limelight or a gravity-defying bank balance or even a vacation in the Swiss Alps; success is being right where you want to be, being who you are, with those you want to be with. The bliss of pursuing a passion with no thought of en-cashing it is the most liberating emotion. Instead of chasing a designation or state of being just because you had chased it for far too long, you feel empowered enough to let go of what does not work for you anymore.

Actor Sian Clifford, who played Claire in Fleabag, speaks of how sudden success can be rattling. She said she turned to meditation after a breakdown. In 2015 she launched Still Space to ‘destroy the delusion that business and burnout equal success’.

Success perhaps is less to do with rising to the top of your profession; it is all to do with being in a field of own choosing.

Shinie Antony is a writer and editor based in Bangalore. Her books include The Girl Who Couldn't Love, Barefoot and Pregnant, Planet Polygamous, and the anthologies Why We Don’t Talk, An Unsuitable Woman, Boo. Winner of the Commonwealth Short Story Asia Prize for her story A Dog’s Death in 2003, she is the co-founder of the Bangalore Literature Festival and director of the Bengaluru Poetry Festival.

Read Shinie Antony's columns here.

There is more to life than chasing success

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